Uncyclopedia

[ori-STUDFARM]

A wiki full of inaccuracies and untruths….it’s so funny!!

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Main_Page

Harrison Ford

Early Life

Harrison Indiana Han Jack Rick Deckler Jones Solo Ryan Ford was created by collision of particles under the sheer gravitational force of his own balls. However this event also cause his homeworld of Alderaan to being to break apart. It was then in the final momments of his home planet that his adoptive father Han Solo placed him a escape pod and shot him towards Earth. He was found by Dr. Henry Jones at the family farm in Detroit, he learned the ancient art of nerf-herding, and soon became national horse-riding champion at the age of twelve. Harrison’s adopted father tried his best to give his son a respectable education, but was never happy with his son’s grades. By the age of fifteen, he could barely calculate the square root of negative one, let alone recite pi to 100,000 places. His most notable attempt at English composition became the most notorious piece of prose in the entire galaxy: Fisher Price (the likes of which are still being debated by scholars to this day).
This unfortunate situation did not deter his adopted father from seeing the talent within his son. Jones spent his entire fortune on Kazoo lessons for Harrison (which left Ford little money to spend on his greatest, albeit doomed creation, the Edsel). Still, all was not lost as Harrison soon found himself playing in several gigs with such notables as Punk Floyd at Jabba the Hutt’s palace. The well-known composition “Cantina” is reportedly an uncredited composition of his. After finish school Harrison tried serveral avenues; smuggler, archaeologist, cybrog cop, spy, gelato sellsman. However, it was some time shortly after he completed the kessel run in 12 parsec that he was capture by the CNN guy and frozen in carbonite and was sold to his old friend Jabba. But Harrision had powerful friends, mainly a gay robot, a space wizard, a bitch with a gun, and the last black guy in the galaxy.This would eventually turn out to be Jabba’s undoing.

Glasgow

Glasgow is an city in the west of Scotland, also known as Scafftown. Located in Scotland Glasgow is famous for its pleasant weather and religious conflict. The inhabitants consist of either morbidly obese people, immigrant Street kids or a wonderful species called Neds; there have also been dramatic changes in the population of the city with an ever increasing amount of Eastern Europeans making a new life. This usually consists of either begging or selling the Big Issue.
Overall the city has an abysmal track record in both violent crime and obesity. This is why there are so many American Tourists here, they fit right at home; they also seem to have a tendency to like the terrible music produced here, initially Glasgow’s music was made in order to scare the English off, now the Americans (along with the English) can’t seem to stay away.
Glasgow was voted Europe’s Capital of Culture, being every bit as depressing and grey as a Dostoyevsky novel and suffering from even more dreadful levels of Fascism and poverty than any Russian Hellhole. Glasgow also shares a pact with Germany that all new architecture must have a great deal of ‘Industrial Art’ to make it look modern and innovative; sadly it only adds to the bleakness. The city also prides itself as being the hardest in Europe.

BIG JOBBIES

[Bucho]

I don’t know how a fine upstanding citizen like myself ended up on this page, but I did – http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Sex

- Women sense my power and they seek the life essence.

[ori-STUDFARM]

Okay….for some reason, the site now places the image of a rasher of bacon across your screen….and that just made me hungry!

and p[ompted me to look up bacon

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Bacon

BIG JOBBIES

[Larkitect]

i reported some of the information as inaccurate.

My essence still senses Bucho's women.

[Author]

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