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The Switched ON Show

The Switched ON Show | Comedic Chaos and Stuff


  • Mar 18 / 2011
  • 1

Being Professional Does Not Mean Being Boring

I was given a job offer recently, and although I was really ready to make the move from my current position, I really wanted to say something less typical about my departure. –Or at least say it more creatively.

If you search the whole damn inner net of webbed pipes and shit, you’ll find a crap ton of professional view on how a resignation letter should be written, and they’ll all be 90% the same, and 95% bullshit. You are leaving a job, it’s no fucking secret that something better has indeed come along. Many people are very happy and excited to get the fuck out of the cubicle hole they are in, yet they all include things like “It is with a heavy heart”, “…I’ve learned so much from each and every one of you…”,  “…I appreciate the shared knowledge and professionalism…” or “…I’ll still keep the department photo up every night that I stroke it after the new better, hotter and sexier job…”. In the end, it’s boring, nobody cares and everyone knows which part is total crap. If you want to stay professional just send over “Announcement Purpose: Resigning     Effective Date: [insert date here]”  That’s enough to do what you have to do professionally.

Now in searching the whole damn inner net of webbed pipes and asian walrus porn what you will find is creative solutions to quitting your job. If you don’t mind not only burning the bridges, but also the town and all of the daycares that surround it with cute little cooing babies in them. Why are people creative and professional? Why can’t you have fun, and leave on good terms? I say you can… so I did.

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  • Nov 09 / 2009
  • 0
News & Announcements

Revisiting the Past

It’s been a long time since the website was complete, and I’m sure that fact that I’ve decided to print that means that I need to backup everything n-n-n-now. -But it actually looks as though we are approaching complete again: The Switched ON Show Gallery has returned. Beginning with the show artwork of years past, we’ve relaunched the gallery for the sole purpose of trying to create more ways for you to spend entirely too much time on the website.

Now you can look back in time to see just how sexy Rob started out, what stupid art ideas has The Captain running off-mic to make show notes and what Jerry’s random subject matter is represented in full-color glory.  I first started creating the artwork at show 101, as a way to fancy the files up and just generally entertain myself.  A few of these were actually funny, and I committed to during unique artwork for each and every show, as well as over-committing to traveling back in time to do the first 100.  Well listen, I gave it my best shot, but contrary to popular belief, I’m not made of time and success.  My sharp wit, chiseled features and substantial presence can’t be brought to bear on the world’s problems without something slipping through the cracks until such a day comes as I am sick of doing the work I’m paid to do, and I actually decide to spend 7 minutes mending the broken and bringing a glimmer of hope to those lives I touch each and every day.  In short, don’t expect to much from me, I’ll let you down.  But for now, let me distract you from that point by sending you back in time to the sort of half-ass working gallery!  Don’t hold your breath for immediate updates, I’m not a fucking miracle worker over here…  I’m just one man.

Go to the Gallery n-n-n-now..

  • Oct 23 / 2009
  • 0
News & Announcements

The Switched ON Phrase Generator

Another of these little project ideas that has come on the show, is now  yours to enjoy or confuse others.  The Switched ON Show Phrase generator was created to give you something to say in every situation.  Just hit generate, and you’ll be able to compare the beauty of a woman in public to something anyone can relate to: “Did you see her?  She’s as hot as a gynecologist with down syndrome!”  You’ll amaze your friends and they’ll be as envious as a gallon of accountants at a Six Flags theme park or as confused as an army of bionic wookies at an adult film shoot; either way you are likely to be given the key to the city, be the benefactor of a virgin sacrifice, and be elected the king of words.