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Transformers was good, but …

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Transformers was good, but …

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 23 total)
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  • #439
    Frank
    Participant

    Okay, since I’m getting WAY too hyped up about this movie, it’s time that I do what I always do in this situation: Start thinking about why this moving isn’t going to be as good as I think it will be. Thought I’d share some of them with you. So, here are the top 10 reasons why you’ll like Transformers, but you’ll be leaving the theater less than happy.

    10.) Shia LaBeouf – This kid’s been in everything here lately. On top of that, he gets to spend most of the movie messing around with the aptly-named Megan Fox.
    9.) Jon Voight – You’re going to sit back and think to yourself, “Wow, this guy doesn’t really understand what he’s saying.” He knows the lines, but he’s going to be about as dry as burnt toast delivering them. Which leads us to …
    8.) The acting – Now, I know what you’re thinking: I didn’t spend all this money to come watch a Transformers movie for the acting. While it’s true that this movie probably won’t net anyone any acting award nominations, it would be nice to have some decent acting.
    7.) The Script – I have a feeling this movie is going to be filled with cheesy lines, like LaBeouf’s line about Optimus being Japanese or when he tells Optimus that they have to stay out of sight because his parents would kill him.
    6.) Bumblebee – Bumblebee isn’t a yellow Volkswagen. He’s not even a Volkswagen. He starts out as an older Camero, then changes himself into a newer Camero. On top of that, Bumblebee doesn’t talk in the movie. His voicebox, if you will, is damaged in a war and he can only communicate through the radio. Was this really necessary? Why can’t we have Bumblebee talking?
    5.) Voices – They were able to get Peter Cullen back (thank God) to provide the voice of Optimus, but he’s not going to sound like he did in the cartoons. It’s not that he’s gotten older, but it’s almost like they changed his voice somehow in editing. Of course, there’s also Hugo Weaving playing Megatron. When I think of Megatron, I think of this very throaty, almost raspy voice. I’m not sure Weaving can pull that off. Besides, it’s going to be weird thinking that, at some point, Megatron’s going look out and say, “Mr. Optimus Prime …”
    4.) The Blitz – Michael Bay has teased us now for more than a year about this movie. He’s given us little snippets and teasers here and there, but for the most part, he’s been very secretive about the movie. That’s all going to change now that we’re less than a month away from the release of the movie. There are going to be interviews, new TV spots, trailers … and then there’s the big marketing push. Transformers is going to be on everything. Every can of Pepsi, every box from Pizza Hut, etc. To go from 0-60 like that may not sit well with some.
    3.) No energon cubes – Wasn’t this what everything was all about to begin with? Deplete the Earth’s resources so that the Decepticons can go back to Cybertron? Nope, nothing.
    2.) No Soundwave – One of my favorite characters in the cartoons is no where to be found in this movie. Gonna miss that one.
    1.) It’s not the same – Every notion and remembrance of the cartoon should be wiped from our collective memories before going in to see this movie because it’s not going to be like the cartoon. Everything looks different, the story isn’t the same as the cartoon, etc. There was no prehistoric crash into a volcano. It seems like they just fall out of the sky and go from there. It’s like watching X-Men or Spiderman and thinking to yourself, “That’s not right. That’s not how it’s supposed to happen.”

    So there you go. There’s my list. I hope that I’ve deflated all the high hopes out there enough so that when the movie does come out, we can all enjoy it. Don’t get me wrong, I am really looking forward to seeing this movie and I’ll probably be there opening night to see it. I’m not bashing it, I’m just trying to prepare myself for a worst-case scenario kind of thing..

    #6381
    rob
    Participant

    You know what I’m expecting? Independence Day. That summer, it was everywhere, and it was a damn entertaining time at the movies. You look back now and go, “Well, that movie sucks!” True, but it was an experience.

    They used the shell of the idea, and that’s all. And I’m sorta fine with that.

    #6393
    thx_1227
    Participant
    Frank wrote:
    Okay, since I’m getting WAY too hyped up about this movie, it’s time that I do
    10.) Shia LaBeouf – This kid’s been in everything here lately.

    Including Indy 4….

    #6390
    Bing
    Participant

    First of all

    what kind of fucked up name is Shia LaBeouf anyway?

    Everytime I hear it I think of that chick that played the oldest daughter on Cosby and a sheep dog…get a real name dumbass

    #6398
    jbs
    Participant
    Bing wrote:
    what kind of fucked up name is Shia LaBeouf anyway?

    it’s the sound of my cock being shoved in her mouth.

    #6378
    Version3
    Keymaster

    Shia is a dude… and it probably is that sound.

    #6389
    Bing
    Participant

    😯 😯 😯 😯

    #6383
    Pa-ul
    Participant

    (Sound of silence broken with some cricket chirps)

    (sound of a few nervous coughs, followed by running feet petering out into the distance)


    If it doesn’t work, jam a screwdriver in there and jiggle it about.

    #6397
    jbs
    Participant

    hmmm…damn.

    I was really hoping Shia was the chick.

    fag.jpg

    #6380
    Version3
    Keymaster

    Yeah, the chick in that movie looks pretty good, even though she has a Jennifer Connelly head. I couldn’t help but pick on you, because yeah he has a chick like name.

    #6388
    Bing
    Participant

    Theme song for the movie?
    http://hornyoyster.com/video-youtube.php?id=vjJYVBI1gfI&title=New%20Transformers%20theme%20song

    and what is a Jennifer Connelly head?

    #6396
    jbs
    Participant

    is that Linkin Park?

    #6392
    Frank
    Participant

    Not the theme song, but a song floating around the net for awhile. It’s not on the CD list for the movie (yes, they do sound a lot like Linkin Park). But apparently, this isn’t it.

    Linkin Park’s “What I’ve Done” is on the soundtrack though and can be heard in the latest big trailer for the movie.

    #6379
    Version3
    Keymaster
    Bing wrote:
    and what is a Jennifer Connelly head?

    You know, that kinda big head on the skinny body, with the big full hair look. I don’t like JC, I think she is kinda generic looking, but this young girl looks just enough like her to make the comment work, but not enough for me to approve more of her looks.

    #6387
    Bing
    Participant

    Bryan I don’t know that we haven’t had this conversation before so bear with me.

    As a fellow people hater and all around curmudgeon (did I spell that right?)…..sometimes its easier for us to approach it from the other angle (yeah, yeah…the other angle…wink wink..nudge nudge)

    anyway….as far as celebrities go, not limited to actresses…who is hot and talented in your opinion?

    feel free to make a list…..

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