With Iron Man, the reviews have said that Robert Downey, Jr.’s the reason to watch it, because he’s so damn good. And it marks the first time Marvel was on their own making a movie — no producer-stiffs to fuck things up.
Speed Racer — I think it looks like peppered ass, but every early review I’ve read just cums all over it. One even said that this is the movie that redeems the last two Matrix movies, and that the Wachowskis have still got it. Yeah, just don’t know. Kinda interested after I read the reviews, but I think it still looks like Turkish asscream.
X-Files 2: I Still Like UFO Shit — I so want this movie to just kick my ass and call me names, but I somehow am very cautious about it, like it could also be, in fact, ass. But I really want it to rock.
Get Smart — cautiously optimistic, but looks strangely like an asscake.
Wall-E — definitely looking forward to this one. Pixar hasn’t made a assish movie yet. Cars was very eh, but far from bad, so this is probably the one sure-fire hit.
Hellboy II — I know you’re not a fan, Bryan, but I quite like the first Hellboy, so here’s to hoping that II isn’t an asstrickle.
The Dark Knight — I’m already buying it, no matter how much assmongery is in it. Nah, come on, who’s not looking forward to this?
Step Brothers — Yeah, I know Will Ferrell does the same thing all the time, but I still think our John Cougar Mellencamp/21B shit’s funny, so get off my back, you bunch of assberries!
Star Wars Clone Wars Ass Wars — could be ass, or it could be asstastic!!
Pineapple Express — looks funny. Kinda. ASS ASS ASS!
Ergo, the word of the day is ass. Don’t know why, don’t ask.